Campbell Newman is looking to life after politics after the latest ReachTEL poll has pointed to him losing his seat of Ashgrove to Labor’s Kate Jones.
Shrugging off reports that he was disappointed at the looming electoral loss, the Premier said that this was all part of his strong plan for the future.
“Everyone knows I’m tough on crime. What they probably don’t know is that I’m also tough on grime!”
Mr Newman said that, after the election on Saturday, he would be announcing the launch of his own line of household cleaning products.
“My range of Strong cleaning products clean the toughest of surfaces and caked on stains. And do it strongly.”
Mr Newman’s cleaning range is rumoured to include:
- Strong Surface Cleaner – makes even the ugliest bench look good
- Strong Stench Deodoriser – what every party needs!
- Strong Dishwashing Liquid – tough on stains but gentle on hands
- Strong Toilet Brushes – for those difficult to reach spots
- Strong-ply Toilet Paper and Strong-ply Tissues – excellent for discreetly cleaning up embarrassing ‘donations’.
In the unlikely event that Mr Newman retains Ashgrove, he has vowed to clean the floor with the Labor Party for another three years.
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