Brisbane parents are withdrawing their children from school after hundreds of suspected cases of Ebola have been reported.
According to social media, large numbers of children are calling in sick to Brisbane schools each day with symptoms of nausea, fever and headaches.
The classic early symptoms of Ebola.
“Going to kill us all”
Mother of three Jasinta Flaxon voiced the concern of many Brisbane parents.
“I’m absolutely terrified,” she said.
“Ebola is going to kill us all.”
“It’s like I immunised the kids for nothing.”
“Falling like flies”
Distressed dad Steve Porter is dismayed at the official response to the Ebola outbreak in Brisbane.
“These gutless politicians and so-called ‘health experts’ say Ebola is not a serious threat to Australians.”
“But every night the TV is telling us about another suspected Ebola case.”
“Our kids are falling like flies and no one’s doing a thing about it.”
But some older Australians lay the blame squarely at the foot of the younger generation.
“Kids were never sick when I was at school,” remembers 62 year old Bert Jephson.
“And certainly no one had Ebola.”
“People were tougher back then. Kids today are soft.”
Organisers of the upcoming G20 conference are confident the event will go ahead despite the Ebola outbreak in Brisbane.
“Stay calm, dress appropriately and keep watching Channel 9 for updates,” said a G20 spokesman.
Brisbane residents can report new cases of Ebola by clicking HERE.
The Tunnel are satire writers from Brisbane. For more of our stories, click HERE.
You can also subscribe to our blog by email (it’s free!)