The latest study on mobile phone addiction has revealed that many parents on mobile phones are actually reading about other parents on mobile phones.
The startling revelation follows ongoing internet debate about the use of mobile phones by parents in front of their children.
According to Dr Sonia Prendagast of the University of Queensland’s Science Memes and Listicle Unit, the problem of mobile phone addiction has become so big that parents are addicted to reading about it.
“Our study shows that mobile phone addiction by parents follows a clear pattern.”
“First, a parent will be at the park with their kids, bored out of their minds. Whilst the children are happily playing, the parent will check their mobile phone for missed text messages and to have a quick look at Facebook.”
“In most instances, Facebook will have an article condemning the practice of parents using their mobile phones at the park. The parent will feel ashamed but also outraged. The parent will leave a comment on the article and share it with their friends.”
“Next time the parent is at the park, they will check their mobile phone again, even though they tell themselves they shouldn’t. This time there will be a new article on Facebook defending the practice of parents using their mobile phones at the park.”
“The author will typically salute the parent on the mobile phone and tell others not to judge them. The author will also suggest the parent on the mobile phone might be looking for life-saving medical treatment for their child or doing internet shopping for an absent spouse who is defending human liberty in the Middle East.”
“Although the parent in the park is not looking for life-saving medical treatment or shopping for a hero spouse, they will enthusiastically click ‘Like’ and share the article with their friends.”
“The next time the parent is at the park, they will greedily pick up their mobile and look for more articles on whether they should or shouldn’t be on the phone.”
“If Facebook is not forthcoming with anything new, the parent will do a Google search.”
“If this rabbit hole proves unsatisfying, the parent will go onto either Facebook or Twitter and post, ‘I am at the park looking at my mobile phone,’ hoping someone will rise to the bait.”
“Before long, the parent will be dragging their children to the park, just so they can have another chance to read articles on their mobile phone about parents reading their mobile phones at the park.”
Dr Prendagast doubts there is any easy cure for the mobile phone addiction epidemic.
“Unfortunately, our study only gives parents on mobile phones something new to read about on their mobile phones.”
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