Australian spin-bowling legend Shane Warne has demanded cricket’s Decision Review System (DRS) be extended to off-field decisions.
“It’s just ridiculous at the moment,” says Warne.
“Cricket Australia told me there was no way some blonde idiot with bad taste in women and a love for self-promotion would ever lead the national team.”
“Then they made Michael Clarke captain!”
Warne proposes that all contentious decisions, including team selections and the awarding of T20 franchises, be referred to a “third umpire” for review.
He cited the success of his own personal life – where every decision is run past millions of Twitter followers – as proof that greater public accountability is essential in the modern age.
“If I’d been making my own decisions, I’d still be hitting onto women in nightclubs.”
“But, look at me now. I’ve bagged Liz Hurley!”
The Tunnel are satire writers from Australia. For more of our stories, click HERE.
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